Not the best week ever...

It is amazing how a single event can change everything.  With just a few words everything can change.  And, then, there are those moments you will never forget...Monday was one of them. 

I know our district has been in financial distress.  We have failed the last two levies and the upcoming one is not looking good.  Housing values are going down, people are unemployed, and the state is making cuts.  Money is running out.  Painful cuts have to be made and it isn't going to be easy.  I knew the district was going to have to lay off several teachers, but we didn't know who or what programs would be on the chopping block.  We had been told for months that programs would be safe this time around, so I had confidence I would escape for at least one more school year...just enough to finish my intervention license and slide into another position in the district.  Sunday we had a meeting and were told 32 teachers would have to be let go for next school year and that the cuts would be made the following day.  I was really upset know that our schools, the community and the students (including our girls who will be starting school here soon) were going to suffer.  You can't maintain an 'Excellent with Distinction' rating and  continue to make deep cuts to the heart and soul of the district.  But, because of previous conversations I had had with higher-ups in the district, I though I would be ok...this time.

Monday was a hard day for everyone.  The general morale in the building was the lowest I have ever seen as a teacher.  Working in a school, we are more like family than co-workers so it is hard to see people go.  I was ok until after lunch.  Then I got a text from a friend who said she had a meeting with her principal after school...that only meant one thing.  I managed to make it through the rest of my classes and was straightening up my classroom when my principal and assistant principal walked in.

They didn't even have to say anything. I knew...RIF.

Reduction in Force.

My heart just sank and I started to cry.  They tried to make me feel better and encourage me by telling me how much I have done for the school and the FCS program, how much the students love me and how much they will miss working with me...but that just made it harder to hear.  

Not just because I don't know what we will do in the Fall, but because a job that a countless number of people prayed about for years was just pulled right out from under me...  

 

A job that I actually loved...

         A job that I feel is vitally important to my students...  

                  That I have poured my heart and soul into and leave my girls everyday to go do... 

But, none of that really matters because there is nothing I can do to change it. I was on the list.

I am heartbroken, but I somehow I have to find a way to focus on this school year.  I still have students who need me everyday and are looking to me for support.   We just started a new term and I promised them we were going to have fun!  

As for us, I don't think it has fully sank in and I'm still trying to wrap my head around the situation so I can process the whole thing.  I have NO idea what I will do.  There no jobs in FCS and I am not done with my Intervention license yet.  I do have 6 months to find something else though.  I am hopeful, but in reality, I may not be starting school anywhere in the Fall.  How weird.  It will be the first Fall since I was 5 years old that that won't happen.  At the same time, there is a strange peace I feel about the situation.  A peace that can only come from Jesus.

When this happened, I really felt like the Lord told me that it was ok to mourn, but not to dwell on it...that He needed me somewhere else.  I know He has a plan and will provide something for us.  It may not be what we want or expect, but it will be what we need. One good thing is that we have have been overwhelmed by the support we have gotten from our friends and family.  It has truly been a blessing to see that there are so many people who love and care for us, who will walk through this time with us.  Tesia and Brian gave us the scripture below to read and it really speaks to the situation.

May the LORD answer you when you are in distress;
   may the name of the God of Jacob protect you.
May he send you help from the sanctuary
   and grant you support from Zion.
May he remember all your sacrifices
   and accept your burnt offerings.
May he give you the desire of your heart
   and make all your plans succeed.
May we shout for joy over your victory
   and lift up our banners in the name of our God.

May the LORD grant all your requests.

Now this I know:
   The LORD gives victory to his anointed.

He answers him from his heavenly sanctuary
   with the victorious power of his right hand.
Some trust in chariots and some in horses,
   but we trust in the name of the LORD our God.
They are brought to their knees and fall,
   but we rise up and stand firm.
LORD, give victory to the king!
   Answer us when we call!

                                                 ~Psalm 20 

We are just trying to rest in the joy of His salvation right now.   I know it is going to get a lot harder before it gets better, but we want to come out of this situation closer to Jesus. Everything around us may crumble or fade, but He can never be taken from us.

Please pray for us as we navigate through this time :)

Beautiful

I sent this song, by Mercy Me, to someone who I felt really needed to hear this...whether she believes it or not.  I LOVE you, by the way!!  The song has been in my head ever since.  The words are so encouraging and hopeful that I don't ever want to forget them.  It is something I wish every high school girl in America could hear...and believe.  Oh, how it would change the way they see themselves and live their lives.

I pray, daily, Alyssa and Hannah will rest in this truth with everything that they are:

The days will come when you don't have the strength
When all you hear is you're not worth anything
Wondering if you ever could be loved
And if they truly saw your heart they'd see too much

You're beautiful
You're beautiful
You are made so much more than all of this
You're beautiful
You're beautiful
You are treasured, You are sacred, You are His
You're beautiful

And praying that you have the heart to find
Cause you are more than what is hurting you tonight
For all the lies you've held inside so long
And they are nothing in the shadow of the cross

Before you ever took a breath
Long before the world began
Of all the wonders He possessed
There was one more precious
Of all the earth and skys above
You're the one He madly loves
Enough to death

You're beautiful
You're beautiful
In His eyes

You're beautiful
You were meant for so much more than all of this
You're beautiful
You are treasured, You are sacred, You are His

Pray...REALLY, REALLY hard!!

It is the time of year again where we check ODE job postings, daily (or hourly ;), looking for teaching jobs to open up.  Thankfully, because I got the job I have been wanting for over last 5 years last Spring, we are only looking for a job for Dan...Social Studies, preferably high school.  For those of you who aren't in education (or Ohio), Social Studies positions are rare.  And when one does open, if it doesn't get filled internally, there are literally 700-1,000 applicants for the position!  Almost 100% of the time they end up choosing someone who is also a coach...Dan is not a coach.  

There hadn't been any openings yet, but in the last few days two have posted!  One at Bexley HS and one at the HS in MY district where we graduated (teaching together in this district is our long-term goal because of the community and ministry opportunities!).  The one in my district was internal until today, but I decided it couldn't hurt if I emailed the HR guy and the HS principal.  I didn't expect to get a response at all and if I did, I expected it to be something like "we will take a look at his resume and call if we are interested".  To my surprise, the HR guy emailed me the same day!  He told me that the list for the position was a 'mile long and growing', but he would be willing to sit down and talk with Dan for a screening interview.  My district is a long shot, especially if the levy doesn't pass in May.  Not to mention, a screening interview doesn't really mean much...but it is more than probably 800 applicants will get... 

So if you could be praying that Dan will really knock their socks off next Tuesday to get a 'real' interview with the principal, that would be AWESOME!  Also, pray that Bexley will call him to set up an interview as well.  I guess, really just for the job search over the next few months in general! 

Unlike before, he has a teaching job currently so if he doesn't get a new one we will survive.  However, a new job means more time in the community, less stress and a pay raise.  Is it possible that I want this more than he does...